Around August last year, I started transitioning into a management position at Okta, leading the Auth0 content team and moving from an IC role. Even though this is not my first leadership position, I’ve worked as a technical lead before; it was a very difficult transition.
The position I took on had no current manager for a few months, and a VP was acting as interim manager. But that meant that there was no clear transition path, things were “messy”, and there was a lot to be done to get everything right into place.
So I did what I know how to do when things get hard, work my way out.
I’m not gonna lie, I did have tremendous support from both my team and my manager, and that’s the reason, I guess, I’m still here in this position; I couldn’t have done it without them. But I was still stressed. I had to make difficult decisions and tackle tough challenges. At the same time, I was enjoying it.
I was learning; I had opportunities to produce impact like never before, and that’s exciting and fun, so I went hard on the job and tried to learn everything I could. Suddenly, I had purchased 20 books to read about leadership, management, DevRel, writing, anything that I thought could be helpful. I subscribed to tons of newsletters, which I later curated into a handful about the same topics.
I was learning so much that I created this newsletter to share my thoughts on leadership, management, AI, and everything I saw happening in the industry. I started proactively reaching out to other leaders and engineers, building a network of cool people to stay in touch and share what we were working on. Sharing my journey through words gives me joy, and having you all read my content is an amazing experience.
But then there’s the other side: unconsciously, I had directed my whole life in the same direction. My work, this newsletter, every book, every newsletter I read, pretty much all the content I consumed on YouTube was about the same; my own notes and highlights were all about the same topics, and that was causing a mental load I wasn’t very much aware of.
Practically, everything I consumed was geared towards this ONE direction, with tremendous momentum behind it.
I do this; I tend to fall into rabbit holes pretty easily, and when something captures my attention, I don’t just spend time doing it. Slowly, everything around me starts aligning with it too. It’s a blessing and a curse.
Around the same time I started playing more with AI agents, I bought a Mac mini to use as a server and a base station for Codex. If you’ve been following me for a few articles, you know I don’t use AI to write my content for me, but I do use it extensively for research and other tasks like programming, accounting help, etc.
Before AI, I had a lot of ideas but only limited time to execute them. But now, with this setup, I could be just a prompt away from a new app, a new dashboard, a new site, anything really.
It started out fun; I was using it to teach my 8-year-old kid how to vibe code games and other fun things. The latest was a language learning app, since he’s working on his Spanish and I’m learning German, and we thought an app could help us- something tailored for us, something fun and engaging.
But then, just as I was committed to my work at Auth0 at 100% capacity, I got anxious about my other ideas: if AI makes it so easy, why not build them? If it runs alone, sometimes for one or two days, autonomously trying to achieve a goal, why shouldn’t it always be running? So I became anxious about the next prompt; I kinda felt that any time the agent wasn’t running, doing something, it was wasted potential.
I know it’s absurd, and I realized that when I thought about it, but still, in the back of my head, I was always thinking about what to prompt next.
The agents could execute work independently; that part is true. But what is also true is that those projects were still living in my head. I had to think about what to build, test, solve problems, remember design decisions, and track what was done and what was coming next.
What functions are missing on the language app, what’s broken? What needs better design? What about that SaaS idea I had- did I prompt a landing page already? What’s with my smart home blog? Any new device I should write about? Anything happened lately I should write about?
Everything adds up in your head, and it’s not pretty obvious until you step back and think in retrospect.
That’s exactly what I did when I went on holidays. In mid-August, we did a family trip to the beach; it was really great and relaxing. Enjoying time with the kids, driving through multiple cities within Germany, but most importantly, I was so connected to the family, the kids, relaxing, that I totally forgot about work, about AI agents, even about this newsletter for those two weeks.
I wasn’t capturing ideas in my notes, I wasn’t working on side projects, I wasn’t writing for the newsletter because I had to publish something, I wasn’t checking the Mac mini. My mind was completely emptied from all of that.
And I think that’s one of the reasons why I recovered so much during those days, and why I came back fully energized. And with all that new energy, I was sure I didn’t want to fall into the same trap, so I decided to shake things up a bit.
I’m still working a lot; I can’t just stop. I enjoy my work, I want to get better at it, and I want to continue growing, but I don’t want work to be most of what I do. I want to keep building things with my son, to take the kids to the football club, to dancing, karate lessons, all those things they like. I want to be more balanced with my exercise, run a bit more, go on bike rides, go for a run.
I want to open my Kindle and read something cool that’s not work-related. I want to open my Readwise Reader and see a good mix of things, from personal improvement to management to smart home to science to creative stories.
I don’t want to care if the next prompt is queued, if I don’t meet an arbitrary date for an app launch; after all, if my language app needs 2 more weeks before hitting the App Store, or a month, or two, who cares? It’s all good.
I want to keep those things fun; same for this newsletter. I want to keep writing; I want to keep sharing my worldview, my journey, my experience with all of you.
And that’s what I’ve been doing ever since I came back from holidays. Now I’m not so stressed; I’m still working hard and producing, but mixing in other things at the same time. With my mind less occupied, I’ve been having new ideas and more clarity; I’ve been able to think more about what I want long-term and how to get there.
I’m enjoying, I’m growing, I’m learning and I’m having fun.
And that’s all this is about. An AI agent can sit there doing nothing. The app can take another two months. Maybe some of that potential will remain unused. Who cares?
It’s ok to disconnect and live the life that’s happening around you.